Monday, January 28, 2008
Maybe, Maybe Not
I attended my ovarian support group meeting tonight. We only meet once a month. I joined this group after I finished my chemotherapy. Anyway, I don't know if I will be going back. Tonight there was a woman in the group that I had a problem with. She was very and I do mean very knowledgeable about cancer, and not just ovarian. That was not the problem. The problem was, every time someone wanted to voice an opinion or ask a question, she had all the right answers. That in and of itself is not a bad thing, but it was the way she delivered it, looking down her nose at the person and making them feel inferior for even asking and then going on and on and on. Then she got into a heated discussion with another member about the doctor that this gal was going to and when the gal defended her treatment, the know-it-all began rolling her eyes and shaking her head. She constantly monopolized the conversation. Someone would begin talking and she would jump right in and then go into a diatribe. I guess I was under the assumption that a support group is just that, to support each other. This is not what I call support. I have been to four of these meetings and I still don't know anything about any of these women. It seems to me that it is more of a medical conference than a support group. I was seething when I left. There are at least 4 gals in this group that are in the midst of going through chemotherapy. Who knows how they are doing because no one bothered to ask, or should I say no one could get a word in edgewise. I may be wrong, but I think it is time to move on and look for another support group. Maybe, maybe not. What do you think? Leave me a comment.
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4 comments:
I think it depends on how much you want to be involved. If there isn't a moderator/leader, maybe you could speak up at the next meeting and suggest that it might be good if each person had the floor for two minutes to talk about their week, their treatment, their whatever.
I bet you're not the only one who is feeling frustrated with the "support" being offered. Maybe your voice will give other voices the courage to come forward and things will start moving in the right direction!
I agree with Christy. My first thought was, why is there no moderator that can rein this person in. I think Karen that you can be a big help to others and I'd hate to see you quit.
Christine
Believe it or not, there was a moderator there last night, which leads me to believe that perhaps this is the way most of the meetings are run. Since I am the "new kid on the block" I don't think it would be in my best interest to start changing things if this is the way they want them run. I have since called my gyne/oncologists office and they have an ovarian support group that meets in the women's pavilion. Their meeting is in two weeks. I have nothing to lose by checking it out and it just may be closer to what I am looking for in a support group.
New Kids On The Block are talking about a reunion tour. Are you teasing me with that reference?
;-)
Good for you for checking out another option!
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